Match-a-phobia (RE-POST from 10/4/09)

 Enjoy this re-post from October of 2009!

When it comes to my marriage, I am typically the neurotic half of the equation. I am terrified of heights, snakes, bears, spiders, going down steep hills on roller blades or cross-country skis, riding up actual mountains on my mountain bike, flying over water, touching door handles, setting my purse on the restroom floor, etc. And I silently sing "Happy Birthday" when I wash my hands to make sure I am lathering up for a full 20 seconds.

My husband Dan, who is the exact opposite of me in almost every personality trait, does not seem to have any of these issues. To the outside world, he's not really an issues person. He's collected, cool-headed, composed, or - as the young people would put it now days - he's chill. However, he does have one little hang-up I discovered fairly early in our relationship, a strange idiosyncrasy I like to call "Match-a-phobia."

I caught my first glimpse of Dan's "Match-a-phobia" during a local talent show at the Western Idaho Fair. We showed up, apparently an especially handsome couple, because a friend of ours said, "Hi Becky, hi Dan. Hey, you guys are really starting to look like you fit together."

"Really?" I responded, hardly noticing Dan's deer-in-the-headlights expression. "How so?"

"I don't know. You just . . . match."

Now, Dan has blue eyes and blond hair. I have brown hair, freckles, and dark green eyes. He's five-ten. I'm five-two. As far as physical looks go, we match about as well as Betty and Veronica. I suppose our friend was referring to our outfits. Dan must have assumed the same. His eyes were darting up and down and back and forth between his attire and mine. It wasn't like we were wearing "His" and "Her" shirts. At best, we were both dressed in similar shades of blue.

I took this comment as a compliment. (Yay! We match! How cute!) What I didn't realize was the amount of anxiety that this idea of "matching" would cause my poor husband over the course of our marriage.

It's not that Dan doesn't want to be associated with me. He just wants to forge his identity with the clothes - more specifically the color of the clothes - he's wearing. (Honestly, he dons a T-shirt and jeans most days of the week even in 20-degree weather.) I could be wearing a dress, but if it's at all similar to the shade of his shirt, back in the closet his shirt goes.

Sometimes he asks me, "Do you think we match too much?" because Dan also has a hard time distinguishing between certain colors and shades of colors. It's a tough life when someone with "Match-a-phobia" also has a slight case of color blindness.

I like to reply, "Why, no. Not at all," very innocently. It makes Dan's face funnier when someone mentions how well our clothes match.

Last August, Dan and I were getting ready for a wedding. I noticed Dan surveying the two of us in our bathroom mirror.

"No, we don't match," I assured him before he had a chance to say anything.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

That evening, as we were sitting down at the reception dinner, Dan's sister thrust her camera into my father-in-law's hands.

"Take a picture of them," she said, referring to Dan and me. "They're so cute. They match."

"Did you hear that?" Dan hissed.

I just gave him a wicked smile.

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Fun With Winter Driving (RE-POST FROM 1/21/08)

This post was originally published seven years ago. I still entertain my husband, Dan, from the passenger's side when he drives in the winter, and he still remains very calm. Nothing much has changed over the years. Enjoy this re-post from 2008.  
 

 

Dan, my husband, thinks he's a great winter driver. He never misses an opportunity to point out that he was raised driving in the snow. The town where he grew up receives several inches of snow every winter. According to Dan, his hometown has produced many wonderful winter drivers.

I tend to question his "snowy towns produce skilled winter drivers" theory. For example, Dan once told me about a friend of his who developed his driving skills in this same town. One blustery morning, Dan's friend slammed on the brakes while driving down an icy country road at fifty miles a hour just to see if he needed to turn on the four wheel drive. Apparently, he did because he slid off the road, slamming into the fence of a nearby farm and landing in a ditch. Of course, once he realized his car was totaled, he decided that turning on the four wheel drive would be futile. Now, that's logic for you.

Dan also admitted to me that he follows a similar practice. He peels out of our driveway on snowy mornings to gauge the road's iciness. When I remind him about what happened to his friend, he explains that peeling out at five miles an hour and slamming on the brakes at fifty miles an hour are two different situations. Thanks for the clarification.

Dan doesn't like to use four wheel drive. He says, "If you get stuck in four wheel drive, you're really stuck." I thought he created that cute maxim all by himself until I heard his father say the exact same thing one winter.

Nevertheless, Dan likes to wait until the last possible second to turn on the four wheel drive. He calls four wheel drive false security. I happen to like security, whether it's false or not.

A few weeks ago, while driving on the snow blanketed roads to Tamarack, we began to fishtail as we approached one of the many ominous curves around the mountain.

"Don't you think you should turn on the 4x4?" I asked.

"There's still pavement showing. You don't need to use 4x4 when pavement is still visible," was the calm reply.

A moment later, we began to slide again. This time the car started beeping. What genius invented that safety feature? Dan and I were well aware that we were going into a spin.

"All You Need is Love" blared over the stereo speakers.

"All You Need is 4x4 . . ." I started to sing.

"Don't worry," Dan said as he got the car under control. "I slowed down because I knew we were sliding."

"And what was your first clue?" I asked.

He did eventually turn on the four wheel drive.

I discovered that wasn't much better. When the car's in four wheel drive, he often takes both hands off of the steering wheel to fix his sunglasses or drink his cocoa or adjust his seat. I guess it's that false sense of security thing.

I know I have just made my husband sound like a lunatic driver. But, if you haven't already guessed from my previous postings, I freak out over pretty much everything. The truth is, when given the option, I always choose to ride with my husband during the wintertime.

Number one, I don't want anyone else to see my true neurotic tendencies. Number two, I don't want to have to drive on those icy roads myself. Number three, in spite of all I've just said, he really is a great winter driver.

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Why, Hello Again, Inversion

Around this time last year, I wrote a blog post about why I was glad to see the inversion go. Well, it is time for me to wish it would go again.

Winter is upon us once again in the Treasure Valley, and with it comes that old faithful friend, the inversion.

This is how I roll during an inversion.

Do not be alarmed if you see me with some sort of scarf covering my mouth during the inversion.

"Are you going to rob a bank?" one of my friends asked me the other day. 

"Yes," I replied because that made total sense. 

My husband, Dan, was a little bit more enthusiastic about my choice of attire. 

"You look like a ninja!" 

And we all know how much Dan loves ninjas. 

Here are some of the other fun things that accompany the inversion. 

1. Orange Air Quality Alert 

It's not the worst level, but it's not the best either, especially for "sensitive" groups.

2. Black Ice 

The fog freezes at night and in the morning, and I slide around like some Looney Tunes character when I get out of my car at work.

3. Fog, Especially at Night 

I've seen enough horror movies to know, nothing good comes out of the mist at night.

4. Broken Traffic Lights 

One local news station reported that traffic lights couldn't even sense the cars because of the fog. 

5. Aura Migraine
I get migraines with trippy visual auras about twice a year. I am pretty sure the one I got this week was due to the inversion. (I blame everything on the inversion.)

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A Holiday of Movies

I spent the holidays at the movies. In our early days of marriage, my husband, Dan, and I would spend every weekend at the movies. People would ask us, "Have you seen—(fill in the blank)?" and we would answer, "Yes!"

But in recent years, Dan and I have slacked off in the movie-watching department. Maybe it's because we watch way too much television now, and we don't have time to go to the movies; or we spend more of our weekends attending live theater performances; or during certain parts of the year (e.g., music program time), I just want to crash in a catatonic state on the couch.

Whatever the reason, we reverted back to our old ways this holiday season and watched lots of movies. I won't review the movies though because I like pretty much everything.

On one of early our dates, I remember Dan saying, "Most movies are entertaining, even if they're not that good."

Most of the time, that's how I feel too. We'd make terrible critics.

So here are my non-reviews of the movies we saw this holiday. I guess it would be best to call it a "list" of the movies we saw this holiday. Yeah, I'm basically going to just list off movies now.

The Hunger Games: Mockingjay, Part 1
I kind of wish Part 2 was in theaters now. I haven't read the books, so I'm interested to see how this saga is going to end.

The Theory of Everything
If you participated in the Ice Bucket Challenge in 2014, you should probably see this movie so that you can witness how debilitating ALS really is.

Into the Woods
I was actually impressed with the singing in this film. And I'm not often impressed when actors, not trained musicians, take on some of the most difficult music in the theatrical canon. (By the way, I'm getting ready to perform the role of Cinderella in this Sondheim musical, so this was technically research for me. Can I write it off on my taxes?)

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies
It was basically one long battle scene. I mean, what do you expect with five armies? It was a good conclusion to a trilogy that didn't necessarily need to be a trilogy.

Wild
I read this book when Dan and I visited Crater Lake National Park last summer. While we were there, we even hiked a tiny section of the PCT, just to say we had done it. Nick Hornby wrote the screenplay, and his characteristic wit and cynicism works well with Cheryl Strayed's story.

Big Eyes
Good biopic. This was a more subtle movie for Tim Burton, but his hand was definitely in it. Expect some quirkiness and humor despite the rather dark subject.

Even though my free time is dwindling, I'm still hoping to see these films in the not-so-distant future: The Imitation Game, Unbroken, Inherent Vice, and Selma.

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