Saturday, April 28, 2018

Even Though Things Are Crazy, the Kids Can Still Be Funny

Yes, this is a "Kids Are Hilarious" blog post . . . again. My reasons for writing yet another one of these are:

1. I have plenty of source material. I never run out.
2. I am busy, and this abundance of source material makes it easy. (I still have six school-related performances. Count them. Six. We don't even have six weeks of school left.)

3. At this time of the year, ALL teachers, in every discipline, at every grade level, need a laugh.

So . . . here you go. You're welcome . . .

Kids Can Be Gross
At one point, during the Great Elementary Stomach Bug Epidemic of 2018, I had so many kids projectile vomiting in music class that one of my teacher friends called my room "The Throw-Up Room."

Also, it's not unusual to call on a little one with his hand waving in the air only to have him proclaim to the class, "I just saw SOMEONE pee on the risers!"


Kids Are My Favorite
I admitted to some of my upper grade students that I was getting too old to have children.

"But you look like twenty!" one boy exclaimed.

"I seriously thought you were in your thirties," another girl said.

And the other boy in the room said, "You look just like my mom, and she looks like a teenager."

"You are officially my new favorites!" I told them.


Kids Know Their Fashion
On hat day, I met the kindergarten class outside my room.

The line leader started to chatter, "Hello, inductor! You look like an inductor. Why are you an inductor today? You're a train inductor."

"I think he is saying you look like a 'conductor,' like a train conductor," his teacher interpreted for me.

My "inductor" hat

During sixth grade music, a boy said, "Mrs. Duggan, that shirt is LIT!"

"Is that good?" I asked. (In my day, "lit" was either a euphemism for being drunk or the '90s rock band.)

"It's very good. Get used to hearing that slang. It's really popular now days."

My "lit" shirt

Kids Can Brighten Your Day
Today, we were practicing a parody of JT's "Can't Stop the Feeling," and one of the kids jumped up and down throughout the entire song.

"I can’t hear you sing when you’re jumping around like that," I told the kid. "The singing's kind of important, kiddo."

"Sorry. I can't help it," he said. "I just get so excited!"


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