Sunday, August 18, 2019

Summer Stories 2019

I'm headed back to school tomorrow! As I say goodbye to summer vacation, here are my most popular stories compiled from the microblogs on my author page.

1. I got carded buying wine at the grocery store, which is awesome but weird after just returning from Europe where the drinking age is like 12 (only a slight exaggeration).


2. The first thing my husband, Dan, said when we turned on the television after our European vacation was, "Where are all of the French stations?"


3. The other night, Dan and I were watching America Ninja Warrior and eating dinner. (I know. That's a little pathetic.) One of the contestants was talking about doing something called AcroYoga, and they cut to a shot of a girl standing on a boy's hands.

Dan: "Acroyoga! We should do that!"
Me: "I don't want to."
Dan (standing): "Yeah, come on. Let's try it now!"
Me: "No way! Anyway, I have a knife in my hand."



4. How Dan and I decide whether to watch Arrested Development or Westworld:

Me: I’m more in the mood for absurdist comedy.
Dan: You mean, you don’t want to watch killer robots having existential conversations about the state of humanity?
Me (sigh): Not tonight.

5. When I go trail running in the summer, I like to play a game called, "Is it a stick or a snake?"

(Fun fact: I saw two snakes this weekend.)


6. Last week, my husband, Dan, was at a rock concert. He texted me that someone offered him a hit off a joint.

"I just shook my head no," he said.
"Good, because that can spread germs," I texted back. "Or it could be laced with crack."




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