Awesome First Days of School: Part 2

 

I know, I know. Last week, I wrote a blog post also called "Awesome First Days of School." I'm cheating. I'm still in the early honeymoon stage of the school year where my students' antics are funny rather than annoying. You simply have to put up with one more week of hilarious kid anecdotes because, well, I'm a school teacher, and I have the material.

Party in the Bathroom!

One kindergartner was told she couldn't use the bathroom anymore because she was "partying in the bathroom.”

I found this out when she asked if she could use the bathroom (and was simultaneously clutching herself and dancing around). 

One of her classmates cried out, "She's not allowed to! She parties in the bathroom!" 

Apparently, this is true. She returned to her classroom one day, after being gone a long time, and announced she had a party in the bathroom, and that's why she had been gone for so long.

Drama Queens

A group of third grade girls insisted they were supposed to come in for Veterans Day art team at lunch time. I hadn't even assigned the art team yet or finished auditioning all of my classes.

“We have to see Mrs. Duggan," they told the principal. "It’s our destiny!”

He walked them to my room to check with me.

He came back a few minutes later to tell me, after I had sent them away, one of the girls took in a deep breath and said, “Let’s pretend like that never happened!”

"You have some little actresses on your hands," my principal said.

Casanova
I have been telling my choir-age students that their younger siblings can sit quietly and watch choir rehearsal before school until adult supervision arrives on the playground.

"But my little brother really likes girls, so I'm afraid he might talk," one of the fourth grade girls said, greatly distressed.

“Who’s your brother?” I asked. "Whose class is he in?"

"He’s four. He doesn’t go to this school."

"Why would he be at our choir rehearsal then?"

She stared at me in confusion.

"He doesn't come to school with you. He’s not going to be at choir with you, is he?" I asked again.

"Oh, no. I guess not."

Lookin' Pretty Good For My Age
Some of my first graders were trying to figure out my age. I go through this with my students in every grade level at least once a year. I told them I was 105 because I like messing with their minds.

“You’re in your twos!” one of the boys said.

"You mean, in my twenties?" I asked, highly unlikely seeing how this is my sixteenth year as a teacher.

"Yeah!"

"Thank you! You're my new best friend!" 

Then the conversation sounded a bit like this.

"I'm in my ones."

"No you're not! You're in your zeroes."

"I'm in my teens."

"No you're not."

One child turned my way again and proclaimed, "You're in your fifties!"

Yikes! I'll take my twos any day!

I call this picture, "Not In My 50's, Or Even My 40's, Yet"

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